The Sauterne Dies Tonight

"An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves"- William E. Vaughan

I saw that quote while reading my blog friend Chuck's newspaper column the other day and figured it sort of fit my thoughts on 2004, and it was also easy to steal....Thank you God for cut and paste.

Amy and I are not big on New Year's Eve celebrations. When I was out of control with alcohol and substance abuse, before Amy knew me, I scoffed at the revelers as "amateurs." Now I think we're both simply more comfortable being where it's quiet and safe on New Year's Eve...home.

I've also never really been big on using January 1 as the date to start a diet, or discipline. I think the only one that I really tried and stuck with for any length of time was to read the Bible over the course of a year... I bogged down in Jeremiah around September...it was 2001; Jeremiah wasn't the only thing I found hard to fathom that year.

This year though is different. Amy and I are looking forward to 2004 being behind us...so much so, we're killing a fancy bottle of wine.



We're not big drinkers (I was forced into mandatory retirement from the alcohol pros for some ten years) but we do now allow ourselves a glass or two of wine. This year Amy hasn't been able to drink - heck for most of the year she couldn't eat - and her taste for wine has not returned still, but I think she'll savor one glass of this wine tonight.

The wine was given to us by a friend with the stipulation that it be saved for a very special time.

It's only a 350 ml bottle - that means it's about a half a bottle - but it's still a very expensive wine and we've never had an event occur which we believed merited its uncorking. It's sat on top of our entertainment center in the living room for a couple of years at least, as a decoration.

Today I put it in the fridge - it's a wine which must be served ice cold - and it's about to succumb to our revelry.

We are saying good bye and good riddance to 2004...it has been a hard year. I have seen people I loved and cared for deeply die, people I have worshipped the Lord with have gone to join Him, others have wandered away in their spiritual journies. Amy has been through so much medically it would take all night to recap. We have struggled financially, and my brother used politics as a way of escaping an honest relationship with us. I have cried alone more this year than at any time in my life.

Yet I have also prayed more, my relationship with Amy has grown stronger than I ever thought possible, I have laughed in the face of demons that once would have dragged me into dark places where I would have allowed them to torture me without mercy. I have come to understand the imperative of turning my burdens over to God in a new and promising way. Admittedly the lessons have often been painful, but I have learned about true faith and I know with certainty that I have been guided by the Holy Spirit.

2005 is a year which we expect will be better...much better. Our young friend Erin, having endured a year in rural China, has accepted our offer to live in our home, only a marginal step up sanitation-wise from her previous digs, while she finds her way in life. My company this year will launch a true radio news network in association with FOX and should I choose to do so I may play a very active role in that challenge.

Most importantly though, Amy's health is the best it's been all year and she's getting better every day.

So 2004 is bitter sweet and we have declared New Year's Eve a special night. The wine that dies tonight is a true Sauterne, a very sweet dessert wine. 2004 was bittersweet. 2005 is full of hope.

God is steadfast.


Amy just hollered up the stairs, "Five minutes!" I promised I would be finished writing by 7:30.

I'm done now...done with 2004 too.

May God Bless you.

God bless 2005!

The Book Of Numbers

Lately I start each day writing and reporting stories about how many people in another part of the world are dead.

I'm used to it. In the news business you get jaded toward death and devastation.

In truth all of us do, folks in my business simply attempt to adjust to such horrors more quickly I think.

I mean how many of you are walking about in sack cloth and ashes mourning the thousands who died in the earthquake in Bam, Iran?

That was horrifying remember? Maybe you've forgotten...it was so long ago...One year exactly 365 days before the tsunami disaster.

The death toll figures from that tragedy swung wildly, at one point up to 60 thousand, eventually the Iranian government settled on 30,000 dead. We'll never really know.

I have listened to police and fire scanners eight hours a day almost every day for nearly the past 30 years. It is not uncommon for me to hear police called to a "shooting" only to find when they arrive that no shot was fired. Often these calls are made by people who know that if they call police saying, "someone stole my car stereo" it may be hours or days before an officer arrives, but if they report a "shooting" there will be a swarm of police in their neighborhood within minutes.

Impoverished people in my city call EMS all the time... "for headaches." They use the EMS system instead of going to a doctor, because they can't afford a doctor or don't want to wait in long lines or don't have transportation to free clinics. The city sends them a bill. Most don't ever pay, but they received a "check up" from a medical professional - what they needed. They used the tactics that work in the world in which they live.

I mention this only because if there is any imaginable way to offer a fragment of hope in tragedies such as what is happening in South Asia and East Africa, it must be framed in such cynicism. In countries like Iran or Indonesia where help was/is desperately needed - and needed urgently - it benefits no one to "under estimate" the degree of devastation. The more significant the horror, the faster and more plentiful aid arrives.

Please don't get me wrong, this is the economics of catastrophe...it is a reality, not a value judgment.

News people, relief workers, public officials, emergency personnel and the general public are used to tacking a "death toll" to tragedy.

I truly believe this is one way we as a society cope...by assigning value we are able to embrace calamity and to grieve.
I fear though it's also basic math...death tolls, body counts, casualty figures...allow us to reduce the unfathomable to a jumble of numbers.

Some months ago, after noticing it on an email from an old friend, I added a link at the bottom of this blog to The Hunger Site. If you click on that link you will help feed hungry people. One click provides 1.1 cups of staple food donated by the site's sponsors.

1 click....1.1 cups of food.

I don't write stories or report those numbers every day...I wish I did though.

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Addendum: I came back upstairs to print out some crossword puzzles and I thought, "Why couldn't I ask people to feed the hungry every day?" So now you'll notice under "Click here to leave a comment" is another link "Click here to fight hunger." If you read this blog regularly...it's one or two extra clicks.


O Lord , by Your hand save me from such men, from men of this world whose reward is in this life. You still the hunger of those You cherish; their sons have plenty, and they store up wealth for their children. - Psalm 17:14

Fire & Ice

I saw this picture this morning. I don't remember where.


click to enlarge

When I do I'll at least give the publication I stole it from credit, but right now I simply wanted to share it.

The Bargain Hunt

There was a time, in our life before poverty, when we had cable TV with hundreds of channels we didn't watch. It was digital and we could spend hours with the remote control flipping past shows of no interest until eventually we'd fall asleep.

During this time Amy found one channel out of the 743 channels available which had programs she adored...BBC America. She fell in love with people who spoke in a language I eventually recognized as English.

BBC America's programming has been widely imitated in the U.S. It's where all those "makeover" programs started except the American networks outspend the BBC. Where ABC might spend a million dollars making over someone's home, the BBC would fork over a thousand bucks to put some plants in some unsuspecting woman's backyard, plus they'd require the spouse/lover/children/neighbors of the "winner" to do half the work.

One program on the BBC which no American network has stolen yet is "Bargain Hunt."

It was hosted by this guy:



Although having a host, or "presenter" as they're called in England, such as this clown might be reason enough not to do an Americanized version, I believe the brain trusts at American networks figure "Bargain Hunt" simply won't translate to the U.S. because it's ...well, it's cheap.

The premise is there are two teams made up of various combinations of people: a man and wife, father and daughter, mother and daughter, two gentleman "friends", a couple of drinking buddies, neighbors, etc. Each team is given roughly 150 bucks and told to go hunt around flea markets, garage sales or wherever to try to find a bargain. Then a week later whatever they have bought during their wild and wooly adventure is put up for auction. If the items they bought sell for more than they purchased them for, they get to keep the "profit!"

As I'm sure you can envision - this is compelling stuff. It's hard to believe it's only a 30 minute show...it seems so much longer. There are lengthy -serious- discussions on whether an antique fishing reel is worth 40 quid, or whether one team made a grave mistake and overpaid for a 1950's era picnic basket because the original spoons were missing.

When I watched (insomnia will do strange things to you), more often than not, the teams lost money at the auctions. That was how the show climaxed almost every time. There was a "winner" though...the team that "lost" the least. End of show. No one got anything...no parting gifts Johnny, no new car, no cash, no surprise visit from an offspring the participants didn't know they fathered...not diddly. Everyone simply went home.

Now, on those rare occasions when the turquoise colored ceramic Eiffel tower a team purchased actually made money at the auction then it was a time for great excitement and the winning team would get very enthused, plus they got to keep the cash...not the 150 bucks. The show got its 150 bucks back; the team got to split whatever money remained after paying back the show.

Seriously.


Often "the winners" would split like 6 dollars and be absolutely giddy.

Maybe it's because they had this guy:



To keep us on the edge of our seats and to keep viewers from wondering why they would watch a show where the big prize might pay for a large one topping Tuesday night special pizza...if you didn't tip the delivery guy.

Anyway, this was a very long way to get to my point.

Amy and I are going to do our own version of Bargain Hunt.

Yes, that should give you a good indication of the exciting lives we lead.

Actually I was thinking of cheap dates and this show kept coming back to mind.

We haven't ironed out all the rules but essentially once or twice a month we're each going to take ten bucks and go together to sleazy pawn shops, flea markets, garage sales, thrift stores and the like and look for something we think we can sell on Ebay for a profit. The profit will have to cover the eBay listing fees, etc.

I think we've determined that whoever makes the most "profit", if any, will get to keep it and should the other player also make money the "winner" will get to keep the other player's money as well.

The initial ten bucks will have to be returned though.

That's it...end of game.

Since we're limiting ourselves to ten dollars I don't think we're going to get rich, but we're also not going to go broke.

In truth I'm only hoping for two or three things: That we get out of the house and spend time together; that we have some cheap laughs while admiring truly tacky merchandise, and of course, most of all, I'm hoping we never run into this guy:

Time And Temperment

I had every intention today of writing about my phone conversations with occasional callers to the newsroom. It's hit or miss when you pick up the phone, sometimes it's someone wanting information, and sometimes it's a crazy person.

What I really wanted to do was post a brief recording of one of the more humorous requests for information left on my voice mail, but Amy objected saying, "Our nieces read that!"

That's true, but our nieces listen to the radio too and that's where this guy heard it.

Anyway the caller asked for information about a product we apparently advertised at one time which...well let's simply say claimed to produce an "enhanced love experience." He left his full name and phone number twice before requesting I call him back to tell him how to obtain more information about that one hour "love experience."

I never returned his call, but over Amy's objections, I'm probably going to post the audio tomorrow...I have to edit it anyway. It's not pornographic or anything, I simply don't want to give out the guy's name and phone number.

What makes it slightly humorous in my mind is that the caller is a bit elderly. Actually I looked him up through a public database and discovered he's 83 years old.

Personally I think an 83 year old seeking information about a "one hour love experience" deserves some credit...if not applause.

What brought that character to mind today was that I had a lengthy discussion with an 84 year old man this morning who was upset that we didn't update the temperature "every minute." I understood his point actually, at this time of year the temperature can rise rapidly between 8 a.m. and 9 a.m., but the National Weather Service only gives out hourly temperatures so during the 8 o'clock hour we give the 8 o'clock temperature. At 8:45 that temperature is in truth often off by a few degrees. This was important today to an 84 year old man.

What always strikes me as funny with these conversations, usually they're more hostile than this nice gentleman was, is that most of the callers already have the information; they're simply upset we're not broadcasting it. Often this is the case when it comes to traffic...people will call up and scream at me because, "You're not telling people about the delay on I-35!" Obviously these folks, almost always men by the way, already know there is a delay on I-35, but because they're not hearing on the radio what they already know it upsets them to the point that they call to scream at anyone who answers the phone - I have virtually nothing to do with our traffic coverage by the way- but I do have a direct line.

I think it is a social phenomenon worthy of further study...one day.

Today the elderly gentleman I spoke with told me it was 46 degrees and we were saying it was 32. When I mentioned that the National Weather Service gauges showed it was "officially 32" at the airport, 36 degrees in another part of town, and 40 in yet another, he insisted it was 46. His window thermometer said so. Who am I to argue? We didn't make much progress, but we parted friends.

Anyway that's what I was going to write about but Amy objected to the one hour "love experience" audio so my mind wandered to Ebay. I was going to put up for bid an old cast iron bank I bought for a quarter at a garage sale more than 35 years ago, but I wanted to do some research first.



There are a bunch of similar banks on Ebay that aren't selling for much but they're not exactly like mine and what little research I have done turned up differing results. Apparently two similar banks were made, by two different companies. One appears to be worth a lot of money...one isn't. I can't really tell which one I have, so I'm putting the sale on hold until I can go to the library or find someone who knows more than me about cast iron banks (which is pretty much anyone).

In any case, now I'm out of time to write and I haven't accomplished much of anything.

Well except oddly enough that I may have a bit more empathy for the frustration of one 83 year old man.

(my nieces shouldn't click here)

Still Life

We have a love hate relationship with our dogs...I dare not put a percentage to it.

Anyway, it's hard to get the dogs to sit still for a picture together without one of them licking, snarling, wandering off, or going hunting for socks.

Now we have a picture...a gift from our son.

He didn't get them to sit still either...he simply drew them in charcoal.


click to enlarge

It's dead on...even including the current makeshift haircut we gave Winston, the special needs dog. The little white lines coming off Winston are a trick of the light, not drool, although that certainly would be appropriate.



We may have a love hate relationship with the dogs...but we will cherish that drawing...it at least sits still.

Suddenly I'm repressing the desire for one our daughters to marry a taxidermist.

Books, Rings And That Love Thing

To: Ruth
Love: Boaz
with apologies to Clement Moore and to all who despise bad poetry.


It's Christmas morning, and all through the house
Everyone is still sleeping, including my spouse.

The "children" will snooze until at least nine or ten
Amy broke with tradition wrapping some gifts before then.

I snuck out this morning and grabbed two gift sacks
Bless the gift bag inventor - no more panic attacks

Triggered by scissors paper and tape,
resulting in presents appeared wrapped by an ape.

Inside are two books - one from a friend, the other from me.
They both are of hymns with detailed history.

That's all I'm giving my wife on this day,
with one exception...a note that will say:

"Soon will arrive another small gift.
You know what it is - I'm not that swift."

The box will contain a petite silver band
To match the one I wear, on my left hand.



The letters are Hebrew from the book of Ruth.
They speak of a promise, a love, and a truth.

"Whither thou goest, I will follow." they say.
Words true for tomorrow as well as today.

A few words of mine will be on a note inside.
Meager expressions of love - a dream for my bride.

They ask her to "glean" with me love - perhaps laughter.
To live fairy tale lives...happily ever after.

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May all of you who have blessed us with love, prayer and grace so preciously over this past year have a Christmas of wonderment and fun, and please know you have brought great joy and faith to our lives in so many ways.

Love,

Michael & Amy